Damaging Causes That Your Child Might Resume to When They Wet The Bed

When your child thinks, I feel like a baby.

For children, acting grown up is important, partly because children look up to adults so much and often want the power and control they think that adults have. For a child who wets the bed, though, there is a sense of the opposite feelings - lack of control, and lack of power.

Children who wet the bed may feel powerless

Many children may worry that they are acting babyish, especially since this is one of the first accusations levelled against bed wetters on the playground. For an adult, being called a baby may not be a big problem, but it can feel like a devastating problem to a child, especially a younger one who may see being a baby as being left behind while others in the same age group grow up.

To offset these feelings, make sure that your child understands that children of all ages - even children who are older - wet the bed. It is truly not a problem of age, but a problem of bladder control, and it can affect people of all ages. While children do eventually outgrow the problem in many cases, many children your child would consider grown up still face the same problem.

 When your child thinks, I hate having a big secret.

Most children try to keep bedwetting a big secret, as they are fearful that others will find out. However, having a large secret can affect the way your child's relationships and can leave him or her feeling lonely. Having a large secret is isolating, to say the least.

Plus, your child has all the stress of knowing that the secret may be exposed. The older a child is, typically the more effort will go into keeping bedwetting a secret.

Among the things that children will do to keep bedwetting a secret are:

• Avoiding sleep overs, camping trips, and other events for fear of being found out.

• Avoiding bringing home other children, out of fear that someone in the home will tell.

• Adopting an I don't care attitude or acting aloof in order to avoid getting close to others.

• Avoiding making friends.

• Staying up all night on camping trips or during sleep overs in order to prevent accidents.

• Teenagers may avoid dating.

• All children may avoid attention or notice by refusing to try to excel at school or activities.

• Acting in a tough or self-destructive way so that no one will guess the truth.

Your child may put themselves through a lot to prevent others from finding out that they wet the bed. This can create a lot of tension in the home and also ensures that your child will not make close friends. Worse, your child may give up fun trips or exciting events just out of fear of accidents. This is limiting. You certainly don't want your child to grow up fearfully or in great tension.

Generally, whether your child chooses to tell others about their bedwetting or not is up to them. You should never tell someone else about your child's bedwetting - the child should be able to decide who to trust and who not to trust.

Telling anyone - even a well-meaning teacher or relative - without the child's consent is a recipe for disaster, especially if your child is keeping the problem a secret. Your child may simply cease to trust you and will likely feel more fearful as well as resentful.

However, you can help your child open up to others by showing your own acceptance of the problem. If you treat the problem matter-of-factly and with sensitivity, your child may start to trust that others will, too.

Plus, you should encourage your child to spend time with others as much as possible. Discuss things such as camping trips or other events ahead of time and discuss with your child how he or she could handle bedwetting or the possibility of accidents in such a situation.

In a way, your child may be relieved when his or her secret is finally revealed. However, it can also be a very traumatic time, especially if the truth is met with teasing or disapproval. You may want to speak to your child about what he or she would feel like if someone did find out. Discuss the responses that your child expects from others and then suggest more gentle responses that may be possible, too. Talk with your child about things that he or she could say to negative or insensitive comments.

When your child thinks, I don't want to go anywhere.

Many children who wet the bed show less interest in spending lots of time with others, especially if they are teased or are trying to prevent others from learning about their bedwetting.

This can lead some children to isolate themselves and can also lead to such a low state of self-esteem and happiness that children will stop their regular fun activities as well - even if those activities do not involve sleeping over or even other people. This can be a serious sign of upset and should be taken seriously.

A lack of interest in what is happening can be a big problem of bedwetting. Children can become unenthusiastic, depressed, listless, and apathetic, leading to lack of activity and increasing depression.

You can try enticing your child's interest in new things by encouraging him or her to take part in new activities that seem appealing. Offer support for activities that your child has done in the past that he or she has excelled in, and offer some part of an activity as a treat. For example, if your child has always liked baseball, buy him or her a new glove or a baseball card to revive interest. If nothing seems to work and apathy lasts longer than a week or so, take your child to a doctor to make sure that no physical problem or serious emotional trauma are causing the disinterestedness.